Another cycle ends – transformation and connecting with my feelings associated.

#It’s an inside journey#

It seems lately there is less time to write as much as I used to be able too.  I find myself feeling emotional today, as I am coming to an end of another cycle, what is it about endings that evoke so much emotion, even knowing that every ending is going to open a new doorway.  An example I can think of, is this, ending a relationship that is negative, dysfunctional and has evoked negative emotions associated, one would imagine that one would feel “Happy” and yet the feelings that arise, are feelings of loss, and then there is the cycle of emotions that give rise to grieving.  This is an example to understand.

I say goodbye this week to a role that has come to completion for 2 years, it has been an experience of both positive and negative, positive because of the connections made, the laughter, the giggles, connecting with new people, being able to be a listening ear to those that have needed it, even being a listening ear to those who have projected their anger, because of the space that they were in at the time.  The negative the demands on the physical and emotional body.  I feel it is now time to close that door and say “Goodbye and “Thank you” for the journey, the experience, the highs and the lows.  But isn’t it amazing how closing doors, brings you closer to your emotions of loss, from previous doors that you have closed, or in some cases, closed because you had no choice, because closure may not have been completely possible.

I have just finished today, my 2nd job for the week, this will end next month, it is time for a new chapter, new beginnings, and even knowing that this will usher in new growth, I cannot help but feel a tinge of emotions, like awww, it feels a little sad, it has reminded me of other losses.  You see my viewpoint is this, that in this life, this fast paced western world we are so very busy pressing on, not giving ourselves time to process our emotions, our feelings associated with whatever we may be experiencing that we can if not careful walk around like we are “dead” emotionless, unfeeling, detached from our inner core emotions, and that in my mind is not good for the Mind, Body nor the Spirit.

I understand for many a feeling person who is in touch with their emotions, can feel too intense for many who choose to lock their emotions away, detach from them, store them in a box, never to open Pandora’s box until “Spirit” or the “Universe” decide to give you a situation or scenario, whereby you have to revisit, can you imagine for a moment that had you have had the courage, foresight and strength to initially allow yourself to tap into your emotions for each given situation, circumstance or event at that moment in time, what you would have been saving yourself from re-visiting later? Its true so much we would have saved ourselves if we had the courage to deal with it “NOW”

So today, I am feeling a little full of mixed emotions as I say goodbye to one chapter this month, then another chapter next month, when for the last 3 years I have been struggling with coming to terms and accepting a real big chapter and cycle in my life that was to be my biggest challenge emotionally yet, confronting, the face of what felt like “Death” “Loss” “Rejection” and feeling unworthy.

I have worked hard to claw my way back up from the very bottomless pit of the rabbit hole, and believe you me, there are moments when there is a trigger such as a loss, or a transition, that sets me back briefly, just momentarily to remembering where I have come from and where I have been.

Today, has felt a deeply moving day emotionally, the past 4 years have been hard as I have been working on my business this business and in the moments of healing, working with depression, counselling, past life regression to look at patterns that I may have been repeating, and allowing myself to be defined by how others have chosen to treat me, and what I have allowed in that process, has been deep.  So now couple with the wisdom of a mother who has raised 3 children to adulthood, who has experienced, many deaths, many failures, many rejections, many challenges, I can honestly say that as I sit back I can actually say, Susan, you really ought to be proud of yourself.

You see the greatest Teacher that we have is not Education, is not text book theories, no ideologies, not philosophies, but simply “Life experiences” and the pain associated with such.  Along with life experiences, pain is our greatest Teacher, for in this we are confronted with our weaknesses, confronted with our strengths, with our boundaries, with what we will accept and what we won’t and we are too faced with our vulnerabilities, we are stripped away of all ego facets of our soul and character and then once the unveiling takes place, we are confronted with a fresh new childlike new beginning on which to transmute all of the learning that has been gleaned from the whole journey;

I am proud to say that I am now much more accepting, comfortable with loss and transformation than I have ever been, even allowing myself to visit the emotions associated with the changes that take place.  Today I was given some feedback on my Group that I run on Facebook, and to me it was one of my most powerful messages that I have received, for believe me in the moments that I have doubted myself, in that journey of allowing myself to be defined by what I felt was a rejection of me, and a rejection of me not being good enough, I received affirmation and confirmation that the whole ethos of my Group Spiritual Reflections & Thoughts.  The Journey that it is successful and it does make a difference, and believe you me in the moments when I doubted myself, my souls call and who I was, who I am, I nearly called the whole lot in.  I tried a few times, but was told by Facebook that the page was of value to its followers and they would not let me close it, this coupled with today’s message has indicated to me that I am a powerful, strong woman who has been to hell and back and has risen.  As in the voice of Maya Angelou, I share a symbolism of who I can identify with,

Still I Rise

Maya Angelou1928 – 2014

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

From And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou. Reprinted by permission of Random House, Inc.

My spirit got broken, but not my essence, that can never be taken away for it sits in the well of my soul and comes to my aid in real times of need.

 

“And Still I Rise” and in doing so I have learnt so much about me, and what I am capable of.  Thank you for the lessons, that have enable to me to view them in the mirror of

reflection. photo-1438762398043-ac196c2fa1e7

 

Susan Lawrence

Susan Lawrence Soul Coaching.

We all play a part in each others soul’s growth!

Good Morning, Happy Monday, blessings for a beautiful week ahead.

There are some moments where my reflective processing feels deeper than others, but there is nothing more that I love than a good laugh!!  Ever had those moments where you connect with some loved ones, friends and the laughter just roles.

This morning has me thinking about the roles we all play, I firmly believe that our connections either bring out the best, or the worst.  That the long connections, brief connections, short connections, all play a part in the interconnections of our souls journey.  I believe that people come into our lives either a lesson or a blessing.

The truth is the process of elimination & discernment to discover which, at times through the journey of these processes in takes time for revelations to reveal themselves, what comes after dark, always comes to light.

Make sure though that those that are present and who have shown up you appreciate them, please do let them know that they matter, that they feel important to your heart and your soul, for there is nothing sweeter than feeling acknowledged, validated, and noticed from that loving space of appreciation, who doesn’t like to feel appreciated? validated and acknowledged.

Look out for the positive interactions, those that support you to become the best version of you, and remembering it is a two way street, equally that you support those that mean something to you, to become the best version of them.

Life and its connections always ought to be about give and take in equal measure, not take, take, take, that is an imbalance that both parties can do without.

Sometimes the lessons or the blessings come to realisation later on, but most of all let your soul guide you as to who feels “right”  who feels a right fit, you cannot go wrong with that inner gut antennae that speaks volumes as it either feels good, or feels uncomfortable in its gnawing truth.

Thank all those that have been a blessing, never forgetting a moment of gratitude for all of the lessons and the blessings, in whichever way they come.

Have a great week ahead,

With love & light, Susan xxxx

 

Susan Lawrence Soul Coaching 29258579_640976379573874_8486568649174286336_o10277005_701498216574361_3112295131616827545_n

 

Being disconnected!

Happy Saturday,

I have my quiet thinking reflective head on today, and have been thinking about the subject of loneliness, and isolation.  Facebook helps many feel connected virtually, yet we appear to be living in a world where a vast amount of people feel a sense of loneliness at the very core.

The virtual world, of Texting, Whats app, Messenger, Hangouts, Email, Snap chat and many others, do people actually talk to each other anymore?

Connections being made by text, conversations by text alone, appears to have produced a laziness to connect in a very real way.  And yet there are many that feel a sense of real loneliness!  I created a meme today and the caption said,

“Perhaps you feel empty? perhaps you feel that something is missing? Perhaps it is you that is missing? and you are the one you have been searching for!”

Interdependence is what we have been created for, I still believe this in many ways, yet there is a real disconnection with this happening, so many people searching for gratification outside of themselves, so many seeking for the void that they feel within themselves, to be filled through another.  When in essence to put your happiness at the hands of another is an expectation that may create a sense of dissatisfaction, because in essence another may not be able to meet that expectation.

How many times do you allow yourself to sit and be present with yourself? and to real feel a sense of connection with YOU!, There is so much that you can do when you are present with “Self”, there are things that you can do to fill your time, there are things that you can engage in to make yourself feel whole.

We live in a society that fosters being with another, and yes I do believe whether we like to admit it or not, we all do need someone, but I have come to learn that the time that we can truly be happy, is when we have allowed ourselves the journey of being happy and present with “self”.  That place when you feel a sense of peace and acceptance and being at one with YOU.  It is then that I believe that we can truly connect with another, essentially because the pressure and need, the expectation for another to fill the void that you may be feeling becomes less.  I love nothing that spending time quietly with myself, being in silence at times, listening to music sometimes, dancing, reading, researching, writing, doing things that need to be done, watching some TV, going out in nature and capturing beauty on my camera or on my phone, sometimes jumping on a bus and going to the beach.  There is no expectation from me for another to fill my silence, I can do that.

It is when you finally get to a place of acceptance, and being at one with yourself, that you will find another.  Ironically the very world that has now been created with social media, is connected yet disconnected, does that make sense to you! It has also fostered lazy behaviour where people feel that they no longer have to put the effort in, this goes to both males and females, it is all to easy to drop a message than actually pick up the phone, or pick up the phone and arrange a face to face meeting to really connect.  Like everything connection has even come at a price of disposal, almost like online shopping, pick what you like and then clicking.

Its sad really, a World that is connected, yet so disconnected.

I know that I would prefer to smell a persons presence, to feel their presence, to be able to hear the tone of their voice, their facial expressions, the tone of their vocabulary, how they express themselves, and yet no longer do I desire to just “Settle”, for I have learnt it is healthier to be alone, than with a connection that doesn’t feel real.

“Connect with what’s real, so you can feel!!

In love & light, Susan xxx

copyright! Susan Lawrence Soul Coachingmeditation_by_psychedelicstuff-d55hywb

 

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 15/04/2018

Good Afternoon,

Happy Sunday, I hope you are having a great Sunday.  It is nice to finally see a little bit of sunshine coming forth, we so need this, it has felt like a long winter.

Times are a little bit challenging at the moment with the conflict going on with Syria.  Today’s card has peaceful connotations and we can all do with finding a little inner peace where we can.

When we trust the Universe to have our back we go with the natural flow of things and the natural order of things, there is a sense of trust and there is a sense of not trying to control anything, just an inner knowing that what is meant for you, will reveal itself and finds its way.  Yes to a degree we have to plan, we have to control some aspects of our lives, but it isn’t possible to control everything, and its a good job I say, can you imagine what it would feel like to continuously be trying to control everything, how much pressure that would put on ourselves.

So today’s card talks about alignment, being in alignment with the love of the Universe, and that when we are in alignment with it, our peace simply cannot be disrupted because we are constantly in a state of trust, a state of mind of just allowing things to naturally unfold and that frees us up to utilise energy of worry, anxiety or control to be used in a constructive way. Positive, don’t you think?

So today’s message is as below:-20180415_163649 (1).jpg

Always trust some of the things that you feel are out of your control that if it is for your greatest and highest good, to your greatest and highest vibration then it will manifest and if it isn’t to be part of your soul call, it naturally won’t materialise.  Oh and remember, a key point to consider is this, “A No Is Not A Rejection, but simply a Cosmic Redirection”

In Love & Light Susan xxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message – 10/04/2018

Good Morning, Good Morning, Good Morning,

Happy Tuesday, may your Tuesday be awesome!

We are wonderful Spirits having human experiences which come in many forms and in many ways, oh the learning that ensues with such experiences are vast, are wide and we learn all of the time, we are constantly evolving, which is a good thing, can you imagine if we did not allow ourselves to evolve how stuck we would be?

Today’s message is an interesting one, it states ” I am a spirit having a human experience and I’m here to get closer to love” what does that actually mean, well….. getting closer to Love is being able to view life and its experiences in the eyes of Love, how you may ask? I have found viewing it from a lens that our experiences are sent to teach us and that if we can let go of any victim mentality that life has done us wrong, people have done us wrong, and view each and every experience, person, situation or event in the eyes of “Teaching” we do ourselves a far better service on healing our hearts.

When we align ourselves with the power and wisdom of coming at things through loving eyes life feels and becomes much more bearable.  Life doesn’t happen for us, life happens and it is as a result and a culmination of situations, events, circumstances, experiences that we either rise up into our highest vibration of our truth, or we go down a slipper spiral into our lower vibration.  Acknowledging both is equally important, but the truth is how far we stay down, how long for and whether we continue to allow it.

So remember Life happens to us, not for us, and we are the captains of our ship and we have a choice as to how we set the sail, keep ploughing through those choppy waters, you will be sure to get to the smoother waters in time.

Get closer to LOVE, get closer to your heart and allow yourself to get closer to your Truth.

In love & Light, Susan xxx20180410_081301.jpg

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message – 05/04/2018

What a wonderful message today, this one.

It’s in the theme of trusting your intuition as to when to speak up from a place of Love and not fear, to speak up when you feel ready to do so, especially if there is something that you may not be vocalising.  Sometimes picking our moments to speak up, is a good thing, sometimes there needs to be a bit of a process that goes on as to how you feel about what is going on around you!

I don’t know about you, but I learnt some time ago that as we grow, evolve, mature and learn to focus our energy in positive ways, we begin to discern too as to the battles that we enter, also a positive thing, it saves a great deal of energy being misdirected.

If you have some friction that is going on around you at present trust you inner judgement as to when to speak up and speak your truth, sometimes it is wisest to let the dust settle, let things calm down and then meet it with fresh new energy once the waters become calmer.   In addition trust your inner guidance if you feel a little lost at present, sometimes this happens when there is change or a shift happening and things will usually fall into place.  Trust that!  You will always end up where you need to be.

In love & Light Susan xx

So today’s message is this :- 20180405_190835.jpg

What do you need to release this Full Moon 31/3/2018 – Second Blue Moon of 2018

There have been such a long of deep ripples in relation to energy which has felt dank, dark and heavy, we have just left Mercury Retrograde, that is always a trying time, usually when Mercury Retrograde is around it can be testing and trying times, plus there has been a big solar shift and on top of this, today a Full Moon, which is termed a blue moon, the moon won’t actually be blue, it is just termed as such.

Usually in the manner I post in my group and pages on Facebook “What do you need to release this Full Moon”? it is usually a time for letting go of that which you feel no longer serves your greatest and highest vibration for your soul, a reminder that nothing is ever “Good” or “Bad” it just is, things just have a way of coming to their natural end.  So if you find yourself in a situation that you have felt some ripples, reverberations that something isn’t right (it usually isn’t) then allow your intuition to guide you and go with that.

It simply means the Reason, Season and Time have been reached for that part of your soul journey, and that the Universe your souls calling is preparing you ready for your next chapter of soul growth, quite often there is a bit of resistance and it can feel like an inner tug of war with yourself, that is okay, go with it, things will settle, once you have had an opportunity to process your emotions around what you may be experiencing.

Sometimes there just needs to be a shift for renewal and sometimes we take some along with us, once a shift has taken place, sometimes we may need to let go, and sometimes we need to just trust the timing of the Universe.

So on that note, Happy Releasing, Happy Renewal for your soul to prepare for its next chapter, after all in we stay the same, growth doesn’t happen.

Growth simply cannot happen by staying the same, thank any lessons for their blessings and for giving you the opportunity to have had some new teaching.

Happy Lunar Release.

In Love & Light, Susan xxxxIMG_20180331_202913_29811241491_430514817122947_1670245204_n

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message – 30/3/2018 –

Happy Easter Weekend All,

May it be filled with Love, Joy, Peace and Blessings.

In the usual manner I drew a card for today and the card that came up was as follows:-

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The message is this that any form of Attack, Pain, Fear Judgement are separations from “Self” and these are merely signals and signs that require healing.

Ask yourself where are you holding on to Fear, Pain, Judgement, where are you attacking others? or even yourself?

We all know that inner critic voice that can sometimes give us a hard time if we let it too.  Where are you showing up with these emotions, remembering too that none of them are bad, they just are, but the truth is what you choose to do with these emotions and how you allow them to manifest.

Where do you need to be kinder to yourself? where do you need to be kinder to others? What is it that you need to let go of.  Coincidentally it is a Full Moon tomorrow, Saturday 31st March 2018 and this is a Blue Moon Rising plus a big solar shift which is actually creating a great deal of tension within everyone’s psyche’s, so hang on in there and I am positive that soon there is going to be a shift, plus we are coming out of a Mercury Retrograde at the end of this month, in the meantime, hang onto your hats for a little longer.

Have a great Easter weekend for those who celebrate, walk from a place of Love and if you aren’t feeling quite so, perhaps a little bit of inner reflection may be a good thing.

With love & light Susan xxx

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Guidance 29/03/2018.

Good evening,

phew what a week it has been! I promised myself the gift this evening of some wind down time to catch up with myself as it has sure been a whirlwind of activity since the end of last week, currently tuning into Calm Zen Radio, which is beautiful soothing and calming, feels like a moment of bliss.

I asked for some guidance today on the Universal message and the card that came up was “Oneness Is My True Nature”, now I believe that this can be taken 2 ways, oneness with self and oneness with the Universe, a feeling of no matter what is going on within, or without one still has a sense of inner peace, with an awareness and consciousness of that which you do have the power to change and what one doesn’t.  Knowing that, that inner sense of peace cannot be eroded, not intruded upon because it just simply IS how you feel in being with that oneness.

There is a lot to be said of learning through wisdom, maturity and discernment of what one has control over, what one doesn’t and where one decides and makes a choice to place their energy, its a powerful message that you give your soul in doing this.

So where are you in this moment? in your Oneness? are you content in yours? or are you still striving to attain that feeling of inner contentment?

There is definitely something liberating about being in the nature of oneness, its freeing, it is less pressure, it gives you space then to focus on other things and trusting in the Universal Law of you being exactly where you need to be in this moment.

I hope that you have had a good day, and that you have a great Easter break creating that feeling of Oneness within, in both your inner dialogue and with the Universe and its energetic vibrations and ripples giving you signs of your direction, trust that, always trust the little signs that are shown along the way.

For now, with love and light Susan xxxinstaquote-_temp (16).png

Today’s Universe Has Your Back message 26/3/2018!

Good evening, its been a few days since I have had the capacity to blog, I hope that you had a great weekend?

It has been extremely full on, activity has increased somewhat, so I will try wherever possible and whenever possible to ensure that I update my blog.

How are you doing? this evening?

Anyway I shuffled my deck and out jumped this card, so of course I had no option than to go with its message, I asked for a message for the whole of humanity, for the greatest and highest vibration and this is what it came up with.

“My outer experiences are a reflection of my internal condition” I believe it is saying that if you are experiencing any difficulties in your life in this time frame of now it may be as a result of tension, or inner turmoil that you may be dealing with, sometimes an internal conflict may be going on, we have just entered on the 22nd March a Mercury Retrograde period and this can always be a fractious period for some more than others, communication breaks down, computers go awry, travelling can be a challenge, this just seem to go wrong, so do please bear in mind if you are experiencing anything as such it is because it is the current flow, plus the clocks went forward on Sunday 25th March, so we have lost an hour, some may be feeling these reverberations more than others, especially if one is sensitive to things that many are able to tangibly see, but most definitely feel.

Do remember though that in reflection to today’s message as always it is a great reminder that everything is temporary and that nothing lasts forever, it lasts for the time frame that is needed and for you to glean what is needed within that experience, the blessings or the lessons, you will intuitively know which, trust your gut on that.

So in this vain, I hope that you are taking care of yourself with self-love and care and pacing yourself if things feel particularly challenging, I most certainly am with so much going on, self care is essential and a must.

So for now, until next time, stay blessed, and keep shining.

With love & light, Susan xxx

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