Another cycle ends – transformation and connecting with my feelings associated.

#It’s an inside journey#

It seems lately there is less time to write as much as I used to be able too.  I find myself feeling emotional today, as I am coming to an end of another cycle, what is it about endings that evoke so much emotion, even knowing that every ending is going to open a new doorway.  An example I can think of, is this, ending a relationship that is negative, dysfunctional and has evoked negative emotions associated, one would imagine that one would feel “Happy” and yet the feelings that arise, are feelings of loss, and then there is the cycle of emotions that give rise to grieving.  This is an example to understand.

I say goodbye this week to a role that has come to completion for 2 years, it has been an experience of both positive and negative, positive because of the connections made, the laughter, the giggles, connecting with new people, being able to be a listening ear to those that have needed it, even being a listening ear to those who have projected their anger, because of the space that they were in at the time.  The negative the demands on the physical and emotional body.  I feel it is now time to close that door and say “Goodbye and “Thank you” for the journey, the experience, the highs and the lows.  But isn’t it amazing how closing doors, brings you closer to your emotions of loss, from previous doors that you have closed, or in some cases, closed because you had no choice, because closure may not have been completely possible.

I have just finished today, my 2nd job for the week, this will end next month, it is time for a new chapter, new beginnings, and even knowing that this will usher in new growth, I cannot help but feel a tinge of emotions, like awww, it feels a little sad, it has reminded me of other losses.  You see my viewpoint is this, that in this life, this fast paced western world we are so very busy pressing on, not giving ourselves time to process our emotions, our feelings associated with whatever we may be experiencing that we can if not careful walk around like we are “dead” emotionless, unfeeling, detached from our inner core emotions, and that in my mind is not good for the Mind, Body nor the Spirit.

I understand for many a feeling person who is in touch with their emotions, can feel too intense for many who choose to lock their emotions away, detach from them, store them in a box, never to open Pandora’s box until “Spirit” or the “Universe” decide to give you a situation or scenario, whereby you have to revisit, can you imagine for a moment that had you have had the courage, foresight and strength to initially allow yourself to tap into your emotions for each given situation, circumstance or event at that moment in time, what you would have been saving yourself from re-visiting later? Its true so much we would have saved ourselves if we had the courage to deal with it “NOW”

So today, I am feeling a little full of mixed emotions as I say goodbye to one chapter this month, then another chapter next month, when for the last 3 years I have been struggling with coming to terms and accepting a real big chapter and cycle in my life that was to be my biggest challenge emotionally yet, confronting, the face of what felt like “Death” “Loss” “Rejection” and feeling unworthy.

I have worked hard to claw my way back up from the very bottomless pit of the rabbit hole, and believe you me, there are moments when there is a trigger such as a loss, or a transition, that sets me back briefly, just momentarily to remembering where I have come from and where I have been.

Today, has felt a deeply moving day emotionally, the past 4 years have been hard as I have been working on my business this business and in the moments of healing, working with depression, counselling, past life regression to look at patterns that I may have been repeating, and allowing myself to be defined by how others have chosen to treat me, and what I have allowed in that process, has been deep.  So now couple with the wisdom of a mother who has raised 3 children to adulthood, who has experienced, many deaths, many failures, many rejections, many challenges, I can honestly say that as I sit back I can actually say, Susan, you really ought to be proud of yourself.

You see the greatest Teacher that we have is not Education, is not text book theories, no ideologies, not philosophies, but simply “Life experiences” and the pain associated with such.  Along with life experiences, pain is our greatest Teacher, for in this we are confronted with our weaknesses, confronted with our strengths, with our boundaries, with what we will accept and what we won’t and we are too faced with our vulnerabilities, we are stripped away of all ego facets of our soul and character and then once the unveiling takes place, we are confronted with a fresh new childlike new beginning on which to transmute all of the learning that has been gleaned from the whole journey;

I am proud to say that I am now much more accepting, comfortable with loss and transformation than I have ever been, even allowing myself to visit the emotions associated with the changes that take place.  Today I was given some feedback on my Group that I run on Facebook, and to me it was one of my most powerful messages that I have received, for believe me in the moments that I have doubted myself, in that journey of allowing myself to be defined by what I felt was a rejection of me, and a rejection of me not being good enough, I received affirmation and confirmation that the whole ethos of my Group Spiritual Reflections & Thoughts.  The Journey that it is successful and it does make a difference, and believe you me in the moments when I doubted myself, my souls call and who I was, who I am, I nearly called the whole lot in.  I tried a few times, but was told by Facebook that the page was of value to its followers and they would not let me close it, this coupled with today’s message has indicated to me that I am a powerful, strong woman who has been to hell and back and has risen.  As in the voice of Maya Angelou, I share a symbolism of who I can identify with,

Still I Rise

Maya Angelou1928 – 2014

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

From And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou. Reprinted by permission of Random House, Inc.

My spirit got broken, but not my essence, that can never be taken away for it sits in the well of my soul and comes to my aid in real times of need.

 

“And Still I Rise” and in doing so I have learnt so much about me, and what I am capable of.  Thank you for the lessons, that have enable to me to view them in the mirror of

reflection. photo-1438762398043-ac196c2fa1e7

 

Susan Lawrence

Susan Lawrence Soul Coaching.

We all play a part in each others soul’s growth!

Good Morning, Happy Monday, blessings for a beautiful week ahead.

There are some moments where my reflective processing feels deeper than others, but there is nothing more that I love than a good laugh!!  Ever had those moments where you connect with some loved ones, friends and the laughter just roles.

This morning has me thinking about the roles we all play, I firmly believe that our connections either bring out the best, or the worst.  That the long connections, brief connections, short connections, all play a part in the interconnections of our souls journey.  I believe that people come into our lives either a lesson or a blessing.

The truth is the process of elimination & discernment to discover which, at times through the journey of these processes in takes time for revelations to reveal themselves, what comes after dark, always comes to light.

Make sure though that those that are present and who have shown up you appreciate them, please do let them know that they matter, that they feel important to your heart and your soul, for there is nothing sweeter than feeling acknowledged, validated, and noticed from that loving space of appreciation, who doesn’t like to feel appreciated? validated and acknowledged.

Look out for the positive interactions, those that support you to become the best version of you, and remembering it is a two way street, equally that you support those that mean something to you, to become the best version of them.

Life and its connections always ought to be about give and take in equal measure, not take, take, take, that is an imbalance that both parties can do without.

Sometimes the lessons or the blessings come to realisation later on, but most of all let your soul guide you as to who feels “right”  who feels a right fit, you cannot go wrong with that inner gut antennae that speaks volumes as it either feels good, or feels uncomfortable in its gnawing truth.

Thank all those that have been a blessing, never forgetting a moment of gratitude for all of the lessons and the blessings, in whichever way they come.

Have a great week ahead,

With love & light, Susan xxxx

 

Susan Lawrence Soul Coaching 29258579_640976379573874_8486568649174286336_o10277005_701498216574361_3112295131616827545_n

 

Allow your soul to go where it feels celebrated!

Happy Sunday lunar time,

I have not long returned home from a jaunt in Manchester.  What has really struck a chord with me is how beautiful it can be to get away and have a change of scenery.  I have been feeling of late it is all work, work, work and very little change, so I set about creating the change I desired and went away for the weekend to a music event where I could set my soul free through dance and music, so freeing, so liberating and so regenerative.

You see when you become mindful of your life its content, its workings both from an inner and outer perspective you do recognize what needs to be shifted, I did.  Right now as I write I am listening to 432 Hz Binaural Beats music and it is really doing wonders for my soul.

You see you can too be the change you desire, where do you see an imbalance in your life? what do you feel isn’t quite working? feeling quite right? sitting quite right? what do you feel you can do to change that?

Reflect!!

It struck a chord with me that we can go anywhere where our soul feels celebrated, you see our soul family come in many shapes and forms, earth angels, spiritual angels, spirit guides, ancestors, work colleague, intimate relationships, siblings, children, friends, it is important to allow your soul to direct you to where you feel most celebrated, there is nothing more powerful than feeling a sense of oneness with another, despite the resistance, we all do crave this, its human, it a necessary component of feeling a sense of belonging.  Whilst at the same time, if you have gotten to a stage of feeling comfortable with your aloneness, this sets you in a good place.  A healthy place, a place where that interdependence is not born out of need but a simple desire, the two are intrinsically different.

Be thankful the moments where you feel at one with another, or others for that too is a gift, when you feel a sense of acceptance, when you feel a sense of joy, a sense of love, and a sense of just being able to be you, how beautifully soul powerful is that.

So please do become aware of where your soul feels celebrated, it saves you wasting precious energy on connections that are not good for your soul and vice versa.

Go where you feel celebrated, for this too is a gift.

In love & light, Susan xxxx

(photo credit Le-Kiet) le-kiet-384971-unsplash.jpg

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 18/04/2018

Good evening,

extremely late today, its been a beautiful eventful day, one which I feel grateful and blessed for, the weather picked up and the elements were smiling, that is always a good thing.  I hope that your day has been enjoyable and productive and a happy one too.

Today’s message speaks of our outer experiences being a reflection of our internal condition, interesting. things are very busy but calm at present and that feels a good place to be, how about you? how are things with you?

We do have to be mindful of what we allow to influence us from an external point of view, certainly there are some things I deliberately do not engage in as a result of desiring to keep my inner world still to a degree, that is something that we can control in any instance.

So if things are challenging, dramatic from an external factor then this is a direct reflection of what is going on inside.   We attract what we are to some degree, sometimes this is difficult to see and to figure out, but there is truth in this.

So today’s message is simply to alert you to think and look at this in a different perspective, if your world is fraught with worry and lots of drama it is because somewhere you may be creating it from an inside place.

You have the choice whether to give something time or not, if it isn’t for your highest vibration then let it go.

Try and keep a positive mindset, with love & light, Susan xxx20180326_202951.jpg

 

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 17/04/2018

Good evening, good evening,

I hope you have had a great Tuesday and it has left you feeling that you have accomplished something, made a difference in some way, or simply enjoyed just being in the 20180417_175314.jpgmoment.

Today for me has felt productive and blessed in its unfolding, I am grateful for that.

Today’s message is quite sweet actually and funny, it talks of authenticity and being authentic in your truth is one of the most purest, honest acts of love there is, why because when you allow yourself to be and feel authentic you actually others to be and feel the same, plus it comes from a place of truth and that is a pure and honest place of the heart.

So today’s message is simply about being in your authentic truth and owning it, accepting it and allowing it.

Being vulnerable is not a weakness but a strength.

We are sometimes conditioned not to show too much because we may appear weak, but when you allow yourself to be who you are in any given moment, you are actually honouring your soul and that is a beautiful thing.

Confidence is sexy, being authentic is sexy and being honest is sexy, go on allow your sexy self to SHINE.

In love & Light, Susan xxx

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 16/04/2018

Good evening,

late today with my posting its been a full on day!

How has your day been?

Anyway Happy Monday, many blessings and I do hope that it has been productive, enjoyable and you feel that you have achieved something today.

Today’s message is about accepting “Love” from the Universe as your primary teacher.

You see when we allow ourselves to trust the Universe and its guidance and there being a sense of what you need to go through is for your greatest and highest vibration of soul growth, this is accepted then along comes the feeling of being at peace and not fighting the natural flow of life that we have to experience in order for us to be moved to the next level of soul growth.

Anxiety, depression, fear, worry are all factors that will make this process harder to be able to cope with, and a need to know, a need to be in control, but there are times in our lives that we simply cannot be in control all of the time, that I feel is a good thing, to be in control all of the time is a heavy cross to bear with pressure to conform to juggling many thoughts, emotions, feelings that arise as a result of trying to keep it together, you can lessen your stress, anxiety and low mood by learning to trust that what is meant will certainly reveal itself, and what isn’t will not manifest, there won’t be any loss, you may feel a sense of loss as a result of an expectation of an outcome, this usually perpetuates anxiety, fear and all of the feelings, emotions associated.  Whereas if you allow yourself to just first of trust yourself, then secondly trust that the Universe or whatever you aspire too, God, Buddha, Angels, Spirit, Ancestors, those that have passed, really do have a say in what is going on around you, more than you realise, there is guidance to be found even when we do not think so.  So allow yourself to TRUST.

So today’s message is beautiful in its unfolding, in its truth and it is right for you, as it has come up for a reason.

Have a blessed night, I hope that you feel rejuvenated tomorrow and focus on all the positives, stay awesome, stay you, and trust.

In love & Light, Susan xx20180416_200213.jpg

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 15/04/2018

Good Afternoon,

Happy Sunday, I hope you are having a great Sunday.  It is nice to finally see a little bit of sunshine coming forth, we so need this, it has felt like a long winter.

Times are a little bit challenging at the moment with the conflict going on with Syria.  Today’s card has peaceful connotations and we can all do with finding a little inner peace where we can.

When we trust the Universe to have our back we go with the natural flow of things and the natural order of things, there is a sense of trust and there is a sense of not trying to control anything, just an inner knowing that what is meant for you, will reveal itself and finds its way.  Yes to a degree we have to plan, we have to control some aspects of our lives, but it isn’t possible to control everything, and its a good job I say, can you imagine what it would feel like to continuously be trying to control everything, how much pressure that would put on ourselves.

So today’s card talks about alignment, being in alignment with the love of the Universe, and that when we are in alignment with it, our peace simply cannot be disrupted because we are constantly in a state of trust, a state of mind of just allowing things to naturally unfold and that frees us up to utilise energy of worry, anxiety or control to be used in a constructive way. Positive, don’t you think?

So today’s message is as below:-20180415_163649 (1).jpg

Always trust some of the things that you feel are out of your control that if it is for your greatest and highest good, to your greatest and highest vibration then it will manifest and if it isn’t to be part of your soul call, it naturally won’t materialise.  Oh and remember, a key point to consider is this, “A No Is Not A Rejection, but simply a Cosmic Redirection”

In Love & Light Susan xxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message 14/04/2018

Good Afternoon,

Oh may what a beautiful day, we have waited for some long awaited Sun and Vitamin D, and today’s message actually ties in with finding joy, so one can truly see that the energy is increasing and intensifying in a different way, especially today as at 3.25am the moon went into the sign of Aries, fiery, dynamic, warrior spirit.

So where are you creating your mindful moments? and how? I hope that you are, because it is all too easy to get oneself into a rut of work, home-life responsibilities and all things adult, it is important that we find time to play, today I did, I put some music on whilst I was doing some stuff at home and danced my feet off, oh how I do love to abandon my spirit to the beat of music, in particular to the beat of my own rhythm and my own soul, wanton spirit LOL, I make no apology.

So today as the moon enters the fiery sign of Aries and Sun is shining it looks like it is ushering new spring energy which is also associated with new beginnings, do take time to be creative, to allow your inner child a chance to find joy and to create special moments that uplift your mind, body and spirit.

Have a super Saturday, in love and beautiful Sunlight, Susan xxx20180414_151717.jpgimg1455829944616

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message – 12/04/2018

Good Morning, Good Morning, Good Morning,

Happy Thursday in its unfolding, today’s message relates to getting closer to consciousness, what is consciousness you may ask? consciousness is this, (source Wikipedia) Consciousness is the state or quality of awareness, or, of being aware of an external object or something within oneself.[1][2] It has been defined variously in terms of sentience, awareness, qualia, subjectivity, the ability to experience or to feel, wakefulness, having a sense of selfhood or soul, the fact that there is something “that it is like” to “have” or “be” it, and the executive control system of the mind.[3] In contemporary philosophy its definition is often hinted at via the logical possibility of its absence, the philosophical zombie, which is defined as a being whose behaviour and function are identical to one’s own yet there is “no-one in there” experiencing it. I felt it the best way to define it in more detail.

Today’s card relates to you doing whatever it takes to get you closer to that feeling of consciousness, some relate consciousness as getting closer to “Source” to “God” to whatever you believe in.  You see we also have our conscious thoughts and minds, and the polarity to this is our subconscious mind, sometimes there can be conflict between the two talking a different language.  To be conscious is to be “Aware” “Awake” and having a sense of mindfulness and knowing what you are doing.  Sometimes when you have an intent of doing something and the outcome is different, this may be as a result of conflict between ones conscious thoughts and ones subconscious behaviours.

Interesting eh? Oh yes, I think so too.   So today’s message is asking you to do whatever it takes to bring you closer to consciousness, only you will know how and the way in which this needs to be addressed.

Have a blessed and beautiful Thursday, in Love & Light Susan xxxx20180412_102543.jpg

Today’s Universe Has Your Back Message – 10/04/2018

Good Morning, Good Morning, Good Morning,

Happy Tuesday, may your Tuesday be awesome!

We are wonderful Spirits having human experiences which come in many forms and in many ways, oh the learning that ensues with such experiences are vast, are wide and we learn all of the time, we are constantly evolving, which is a good thing, can you imagine if we did not allow ourselves to evolve how stuck we would be?

Today’s message is an interesting one, it states ” I am a spirit having a human experience and I’m here to get closer to love” what does that actually mean, well….. getting closer to Love is being able to view life and its experiences in the eyes of Love, how you may ask? I have found viewing it from a lens that our experiences are sent to teach us and that if we can let go of any victim mentality that life has done us wrong, people have done us wrong, and view each and every experience, person, situation or event in the eyes of “Teaching” we do ourselves a far better service on healing our hearts.

When we align ourselves with the power and wisdom of coming at things through loving eyes life feels and becomes much more bearable.  Life doesn’t happen for us, life happens and it is as a result and a culmination of situations, events, circumstances, experiences that we either rise up into our highest vibration of our truth, or we go down a slipper spiral into our lower vibration.  Acknowledging both is equally important, but the truth is how far we stay down, how long for and whether we continue to allow it.

So remember Life happens to us, not for us, and we are the captains of our ship and we have a choice as to how we set the sail, keep ploughing through those choppy waters, you will be sure to get to the smoother waters in time.

Get closer to LOVE, get closer to your heart and allow yourself to get closer to your Truth.

In love & Light, Susan xxx20180410_081301.jpg